Facebook Stalking & Instagram Mocking

“I totally met this cute guy last night at this party…”

“Whats his name, I’ll look him up on Facebook?”

Above is a typical exchange between two friends. “Facebook stalking”, or looking someone up on a social networking site to get a feel of who they are, is a common thing for kids my age. Looking at a person’s social networking sites (Twitter, Instagram, Facebook and Pinterest) is a way to get to know someone’s personality, without actually getting to know someone’s personality. We are constantly checking the aforementioned sites: in class, at the gym, while we’re grocery shopping, and by doing so we are becoming increasingly interconnected with hundreds of our “friends” and “followers”.  Often times, looking at someone’s Facebook or Instagram feeds can lend more insight about their life, than meeting them can. Is this type of instant access making us more judge-y and less welcoming? There are times where I have been guilty of “Facebook stalking” and been quick to make judgments about someone based on the pictures they post of themselves and what they write on peoples walls. Although it seems arbitrary, what you put on the internet speaks for itself, and can make impressions on people, even if they don’t know you. Posting something on the internet is no longer something that can be carefree; everything you post has a consequence and has the potential to be seen by thousands of people. Anytime an unseemly picture of me finds its way to my Facebook, I have to think to myself what my Aunts, Uncles, Parents, and even my Grandmother, would think of it. Our lives are so public, that even things we don’t want to be seen become seen. Nothing is private anymore, and with the emergence of smartphones, anything you say or do can be recorded at any time. In a world where judging a person by their “tweets” and “instagrams” is the norm, and “Facebook stalking” is socially acceptable, Are we being too quick to judge?  

Family Holidays Spent Apart: The New Norm?

As a kid, family Thanksgivings used to mean posing for lots of pictures taken with a rinky-dink disposable camera purchased at CVS and flipping through ancient scrapbook pages looking at even more ancient photos. Holiday endings were marked by taking the aforementioned disposable cameras to the local drug store and waiting patiently for them to be developed, and then promptly mailing the doubles to far away family members. Enter Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram: causing the extinction of family holidays since their creation.  This past Thanksgiving, my bi-coastal family didn’t feel the need to reconvene in our normal fashion, meeting in Boston for a 22 person feast. Instead my family, who constantly keeps touch through Facebook and email (I’m looking at you, Uncle Mark!) spent the holidays on their respective coasts. We skyped throughout the day; as the east coast crew was taking the turkey out of the oven, the group on the west coast was devouring appetizers. Postings on Facebook and Instagram made the distance between us disappear.

                Many feel more connected through social media sites, like Facebook and Twitter. However, I feel like this false feeling of connectedness actually results in a less genuine relationship. Because I constantly see my friends from high school posting, updating their statuses and posting new Instagram photos, a phone call doesn’t happen as much as it needs to. Although my close knit high school group of friends are constantly iMessaging ‘selfies’ in a group message, I rarely talk to them individually over the phone. While there are times where this new technology has certainly helped me communicate and stay in touch, there are cases where a ‘skype’ or ‘facebook chat’ conversation doesn’t suffice. The idea of doing an interview for a potential job, while it is fiscally more responsible, is completely insane to me. There is something about seeing someone in person; it gives you a feel for their personality. Having a face to face conversation with someone, while not always possible, will in my mind always trump communicating via technology.